Yesterday I opened the door to leave for a celebratory Christmas dinner with friends. A large square brown cardboard box blocked the threshold. The delight I felt from laughing, drinking herbal tea, and nibbling on homemade holiday treats grew.
WOW! What could this be? I had not ordered anything. All the boxes of Oregon holly and greens were shipped and received by family and friends.
Curious I opened the box discovering a piney, fresh smelling wreath of greens and berries sent by my compassionate, faithful friend, Sherry Johnson from Norfolk, Nebraska.
Do you remember her?
My friend Sherry came every Sunday afternoon for months. She was the mom of middle-schoolers, with busy, short weekends. Yet we’d go up to my bedroom in the four o’clock sun, and she would recount stories she’d heard about Reed that week.
Sherry served as a speech-language pathologist in the public schools and was among teachers and students who had been touched by Reed’s ability to see the needs of another. She told about Reed just sitting with a frustrated boy in math class. In his own gifted way, Reed had unraveled the problem.
I never knew all the things my son had done to uplift others. P. 41, A New Mourning, Discovering the Gifts in Grief.
Shattered by the grief of Reed’s sudden, violent death, what I really needed was someone to stand in the fire of Grief with me. To simply BE there not trying to move me through my grief. Not feeling my brokenness required their fixing. Someone with the courage, wisdom. compassion and patience to understand grief. To know in their heart that when truly felt and embraced, grief opens us to feel more deeply.
Grief requires compassion. That unconditional kindness that we lavish on the griever when we sit allowing the wistful stories, the tearful sadness and the pregnant silence.
For those of us who grieve, having a patient compassionate witness is a gift.
Do you as a Griever crave your own Sherry Johnson?
Allow me to be her for you. To schedule a session email me.
Can you be a Sherry Johnson this dark December for a grieving friend?
Send them the Virtual Gift Basket. Click here.
Allow them to feel a moment of delight when you forward the Virtual Gift Basket links to them as your fresh offering of greens and berries from your heart to theirs.
Everything is in place. You need not grieve alone nor as a family member or friend feel frustrated at “what to do”.
Send me to stand in the fire. It is my heart’s calling.