When caught in the throes of grief it’s the moments, not the words, that reach into our heart. Let your presence speak volumes.

“…the giving of space for someone to discover for themselves what it means to grieve…” Mark Nepo.

My Dear Community,

When I remember the people who’ve taught me how to grieve, moments come to mind – not words.

I recall the moment that Teri, the Methodist minister, came into my living room. I was standing in front of my prayer chair. She looked into my eyes. Not with that look of pity. Instead, her eyes conveyed a deep, “I Love You.” Even though I was in a state of shock, I felt the love in my bones.

Later that day a beautiful green ceramic vase arrived filled with white lilies. They were from two of my son’s friends, also numb from his sudden death. Flowers lift my heart. Anytime. Anywhere.

Another moment I remember is when my friend, Kay, stopped by. She held out a white shopping bag filled with Kleenex and toilet paper. No words. Simply a loving ‘look’.

And then there was the day Kris sat beside me on the couch at 11 a.m. It was weeks after Reed’s funeral. She didn’t say a word. She held me with her presence.

Your presence is your gift

When someone we care about is caught in Raw Grief we often wonder what to say or do. But I learned from personal experience that we forget what people say. It’s their presence in the moment that speaks.

For more insights into how you can be with someone who’s grieving go here, Gifts and here, Grief Awareness.

Now it’s your turn

Center yourself. Then remember three people who have taught you how to grieve. As you breathe, focus on the moment. What lesson was revealed?

Now click reply and send me an email telling me what you learned. I will reply.

 Love all around, above, below, to the left and to the right, before you and behind you,