Are you a parent whose child has died? Do you feel haunted by grief, scared of the pain Halloween memories bring? Keep reading and discover an exercise for finding peace about the Halloween season.

This post came to me after reading an article from “What’s Your Grief”. It prompted me to reflect, learn, and then share my thoughts and tips with you.

Many of you are parents whose child has died. And I’ll bet that they loved Halloween when they were young. Eyes glowed with excitement about dressing up in a costume, trick-or-treat, candy, and parties.

Now, Halloween can haunt you. It can bring back memories and that scares you. You miss your child even more. October 31st is hard.

“Halloween is a pretty playful holiday. You may not have the option to skip Halloween because you have children in your care. Maybe your work requires you to participate. Or for some other reason. If this is the case, keep it simple.

— What’s Your Grief

Try this exercise…

First, sit quietly. Be gentle and compassionate with your precious self.
Then, you’ll ask some simple questions out loud.
Next, “listen” as you feel your body’s response.
Answer the question aloud or silently.

If you feel openness, ease, warmth then those responses are an affirmative “yes”. It may be a soft whisper or a resounding “YES”!!
It may be a contraction that screams “NO”!

  1. Is my name_____ ? (say your own name aloud)
  2. I am sitting _____ ? (Say the name of the location you are in now)
  3. Is today Halloween? (Hopefully, you’ll be reading this before 10/31)

Note: these are your ‘calibration’ questions. If you didn’t feel a noticeable response, please get up and drink 1-3 glasses of water. We are an electrical system that requires hydration. Then ask the questions again.

Now you’re ready to tune in to your body’s wisdom.

Follow the instructions above and ask:

  1. Am I feeling playful as I ponder Halloween?
  2. Shall I dress up?
  3. Shall I leave the lights off so Trick or Treaters don’t come to my door?
  4. Shall I ask __ for help?
  5. Shall I schedule extra self-care this week?

Please share. Let me know what you discovered after trying this process.

Halloween is the beginning of the holiday season for some of us. If you’re worried about upcoming events, try the process above. Your body will tell you what and how to participate.

The Day of the Dead, November 1st & 2nd, quickly follows Halloween. It’s a time to honor and celebrate your beloveds. Wondering how to participate? Check out last year’s post to see how you can Celebrate Your Loved One on the Day of the Dead:

Love all around, above, below, to the left and to the right, before you and behind you,