Who in the world plans to fail? Yet each of us do when we fail to plan. Mother’s Day is this Sunday, like it or not. So, if this day triggers emotional pain, make a plan for how you’ll spend it.

Questions to help you plan:

  • How will you allow the day to unfold?
  • Will you just show up and see what happens?
  • Will you plan every minute?
  • What is your heart calling for?
  • What would you like to happen?
  • Is your mother living? What is your relationship like?
  • How will you remember, honor, or avoid her?
  • Will your children remember you or are you estranged?
  • Have you never had biological children?
  • Has a child miscarried, stillborn, or died?


Ponder these questions in your heart. Use your journal to explore your emotions.

Part of my plan: The therapist becomes the client

Recently I was the client in a Rubenfeld Synergy session. During the session, I became aware of sadness.

You see, I received news that vandals destroyed the life-sized statue of my son Reed. Cut off its base on Friday, April 23rd. All that remained was the right foot and soccer ball.

The statue was created in 2003 to honor artists and athletes. Since then, it’s stood in Tranquility Park, Omaha, Nebraska. And for the second time this year vandals damaged this beautiful place.

The discovery

Initially, I felt intense sadness. Soccer is dear to my heart and a part of our family. During the session, I remembered and felt how shattered my heart was by Reed’s sudden death.


As I checked in with my heart now, I discovered with amazement its beauty and strength. It was in one piece. The pieces mended together by gold.


In Japan, kintsugi is the art of repairing broken pottery. It’s done by mending the fractures with lacquer dusted or mixed with powdered gold. As a philosophy, breakage and repair isn’t something to disguise. Rather, it’s an honored part of the history of an object.


With delight, I realized this very process had taken place in my heart.

What an incredible discovery.


With that said, how will you plan for Mother’s Day? What will you discover about yourself and your healing process?


Love all around, above, below, to the left and to the right, before you and behind you,


PS – Click here for another Mother’s Day article: Where is the Mother’s Day Magic?

If you’re struggling with the emotional process of grief...

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