Many questions arise for those grappling with grief’s grip. Questions like:
Will I always be in pain?
When will the sadness leave?
If I am happy, will I forget him/her/them
Grief lives in the body. And the body tells the truth.
Navigating the world using only our five senses is proprioception. It’s the
awareness of the position and movement of the body.
Interoception, on the other hand, is the sense of the internal state of the
body; conscious and non-conscious.
Grief breaks us open to go beyond the five senses, accessing interoception.
Our body guides us as we go inside to listen to the sensations within our
body. Our intuition begins to clearly guide us. Very often we begin to hear,
see, and feel differently.
Here’s an example of this process at work.
A client recently said, “When you touched my head, my feet got
“So, if the heaviness had a voice, what would it say?” was my reply.
“You are free!”
“So, your feet are telling you that you are free.”
“How does that make you feel?”
“Scared. I want to be free and be happy, but I am afraid.”
“Scared that if you are happy and free you will….?”
“You are not alone in this feeling. So how old do you feel in this
“Little. Like a little needy child.”
I repeat what they said and expand, “Because you are afraid and you
As the interoception continues accessing the wisdom within, we discover
that this little girl is really their ally. As a little one, they were happy and
alone most of their life because their parents gave them the basics but were
not emotionally present.
So, we discovered two things:
- Every time this client feels afraid, they could turn to their happy inner
child. This child is not afraid to be happy. It is their natural state.
- Then with their happy ally, take out their journal and with their
dominant hand write the question:
- Fear, what are you here to teach me, to tell me?
- Then go inside and hear the voice of fear.
- Write its message.
Finally, which of those first three questions is yours?
Hit reply and let me know.
Love all around, above, below, to the left and to the right, before you and
If you’re struggling with the emotional process of grief...
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